Weird dreams, and my faith in you. Yours in me.

[wolven7]

Crüxshadows - [Earthfall]--- Had a dream, last night, about the difference between Justice, mercy, and fairness. Also dreamed of my dad, and my uncle, and my grandfathers. Dreamed of Eddy von Mueller, Al's favourite teacher, and something about a pornographic horror film.

A Clockwork Orange - [I Want to Marry a Lighthouse Keeper]--- I say things, sometimes, in terms of advice, and they are of the "Easy for you to say," variety. I realised this, in talking with mech_angel this morning, before she left for work. I'm not sure that it is so easy for me. (The Dresden Dolls - [Bad Habit]). It's taken me years of introspection, pro-bono and paid psychotherapy, and the conversations that we have in our daily lives, to reach this point, of being able to say "Here is what you do, to make it better, to make it right." And i know, every single time i say something, that what i'm proposing is difficult, is painful, takes meticulous work, and care, and attention paid to every minute detail of your daily life. I know this. I know it when i say it, and if I didn't think you were up to it, i wouldn't have said a damned thing. You know that. I have faith, in you, and I have hope, for your abilities.

Tori Amos - [Black-Dove (January)]--- I don't have expectations, of you, though. That would be rude of me. You will do what you feel you can do, at a given time, and all I can do is be there to push you that little bit more, because i think you can make it. If you don't, if you can't, oh well. You tried. And I would like it if you would do the same for me. But i don't expect you to. If you don't, if you can't, oh well.

I disagree with Yoda. There is such a thing as trying. You put effort forward, and you work with your will, and you may succeed, or you may fail, miserably, scaring you for life. But you tried. You gave it what you had, in you, to give, and that counts for something. You have to be willing, I think, to reach higher, farther, deeper, more curvedly, than anyone else has done before you. You also have to be willing to try again, if you don't make it.

I bought The Self-Aware Universe, yesterday. (Rush - [Freewill]). He doesn't mention string theory. He mentions quantum mechanics, and he even references Gödel, Escher, Bach..., the bastard, but he doesn't talk about Strings. That still leaves me some room to work, I believe. Here's hoping.

I need breakfast, now. I'll talk to you later.

Comments

[tribeofone.livejournal.com]

I also find it annoying when people don't look at the implied meanings in some of the the things I say, but then maybe people just like not listening to me.

[wolven.livejournal.com]

Not so much an annoyance, as an oddness, for me.

And people don't listen to you, because your word choices make you sound as if you think you know better than they, and are hence offering help, unasked.

[tribeofone.livejournal.com]

That wasn't what I was refering to, but is something that I forget.

[wolven.livejournal.com]

Other than that, people Do tend to listen to you, from what I've seen. They may not hear you, or may not think you mean what you say, but they listen. And eventually every one learns everyone else's nuances, if they pay enough attention, and actually try. That's the hard part.

[unknownbinaries.livejournal.com]

Hm. Maybe the terminology should be 'easier said than done', then. I usually understand that you understand the ramifications, at least on a more logical level. Emotions make things...fucky. Defensive. And it's a vicious circle when the thing I want to conquer undermines me simply by it being what it is, namely a lack of self-confidence.

Hm. I'm not sure if there's a 'try'. The perfectionist in me says no, because when it comes down to it, if it will be, then it Will Be. No trying, that's just How Things Are, because I made it that way.

[wolven.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's the inherent paradox. One of the reasons i made you read Thief of Time. "Open the box with the crowbar you will find inside."

In having overcome it, you will be able to overcome it, because you already will have.

And the same thing i said, the other day, about myself, applies, here: Perfectionism is fine, as long as it's realistic. As long as you're willing to fail, occasionally.

[momentai.livejournal.com]

I don't think Yoda was trying to negate the existense of trying, but make the point you made with "you have to be willing to try again."

He was trying to get Luke to understand that you either succeed in an attempt or you fail. If you fail, you must admit that you failed, and hopefully attempt the action again. Many people fail then use "well, at least I tried" as an excuse to give up. Yoda was saying that there are no excuses before or after.

When you suuceed, don't gloat, just move on to the next X-Wing in the muck, and when you fail, don't mope about how big it was, b/c there will always be a bigger X-Wing, so get over that and levitate it.

As an elderly midget, Yoda had to condense his lessons into one sentence lest he run out of breath.

[wolven.livejournal.com]

I'll grant that interpretation. I'll give Yoda the benefit of that doubt. He is several hundred years old, after all; I'm sure he figured that shit out, at some point.

"At least I tried" is not a reason to stop, no.