wolven7 | The main question being "Why haven't you slept?"

Death In Vegas - [Dirt]--- I feel very odd. Sick-like. Like there are chemicals in my brain that aren't suposed to be there, or like there are people trying to attain access to my thought meats, what shouldn't. I'm in a paranoid state, right now, i think. Everything seems to mean something dire, and utterly poignant. No one talking, online, Nothing birght to arrange.

Prince of Persia - Sands of Time - [The Last Fight]--- I keep wondering, when i describe people to people, if i'm betraying their trust, or aggrandizing. Or if i'm not speaking of them, correctly. If i'm focusing on myself, too much, when i do it. My point of view, and how they relate to me. People ask me about

mech_angel, and i don't know what to say. That's a lie. i know exactly what to say, what virtues to extoll, and the descriptives that capture minute fractions of the wonderful whole that she is. But i don't know what's ok, for me to say... What she'd want unsaid. I don't know that, for anyone.

It's one of those situations, where i know that, if i were to act as i would like, uunbridaled, unchecked, but reserved and respectful, i'd know exactly what i could say. (Eurythmics - [Here Comes the Rain Again (Comorbid Remix)]). But, that conflict, again, of what they want. I when asked questions, of others, i tend to direct the questioner to the person in question. It's safer. I like to try to avoid misunderstandings, and fights, amongst my friends, and sharing the wrong level or kind of information is one of the easiest ways to bring those about. I worry.

Prettying the whole thing up, i wonder if the people around me watch their words, of me, as i do, of them. If they hold delicately, tightly, just enough space in the cupped hands to provide oxygen and light, to let them knwo that they are safe, and will be released, soon, where they belong. That they won't go to webs, to be devoured, and decayed, but will integrate and balance the circle. Which, really is the same thing, and you can only do so much for an insect, until you have to let it go, and hope for the best.

Someone amuse me, entertain me, love me, talk to me, validate me. No. Wait. I'm validated. But you should, at the least engage in conversation, and exchange of ideas, with me.

I'll be around. AIM and Yahoo! Messenger.

Ta.