No solutions, only further study.
Apr. 24th, 2004 11:44 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wolven7Louis Armstrong - [What a Wonderful World]--- So, i ended up talking to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
mech_angel, last night, for many, many hours, about the little things bothering me, and finally hitting at the root of the Larger thing, and, in terms of solurions? There really haven't been any, yet. The main problem, you ask? I've said it, before, and i guess i'll say it again, if that's necessary. (Stabbing Westward - [What Do I Have To Do?]). I'm fucking lonely, kids! I am, at a dep and core level, feeling a sense of disparity and alienation, and, sometimes, simple physical distance, from the people about whom i could care.
"For a crowd is not company; and faces are but a gallery of pictures; and talk but a tinkling cymbal, where there is no love." Sir Francis Bacon wrote that. (Johnny Cash - [The Man Comes Around]). I know a lot of people. I know them because i want to know them. I've said that before, too. I've drawn myself to them, because i liked them, felt we had something to offer each other, as a whole. Not simply on the short term. But, in many cases, everyone i thought a Friend, has now taken the level of damn near casual acquaintance. There are walls in place, and i don't know what built them...
I was... half asleep, maybe, or all the way asleep, or fully awake. I don't remember, now. But i saw walls, made of various types of things, sectioning off ideas, and people, from each other. The ones i hadn't built were made of Metal, smooth, and even, with no weaknesses, on my side. (Crash Test Dummies - [Afternoons & Coffeespoons]). The ones i had built were made of mortared stone, easily torn down, or pried apart, at the cracks. Only waiting. The others... all i could do was bang on the walls, and hope that someone realised that someone was trying to come through.
I don't fully remember my dreams, from last night, but i know that they were all about interpresonal relationships, and how i try to know people... The feeling reminiscent of old school dreams, of mine. I think one took place in the Office Building, in my head. Preparing for something. Something in the air smells and tastes of familiar fruit and sweetness...
Praxis - [Interface-Stimulation Loop]--- A kind of flower, one which i haven't had the experience of smelling in many, many years... Very odd. Well, I hope that today's activities go well, and that i can have a few more good conversations, everywhere. That kind of thing.
And now, i think that i'm off for a shower. Later all.
mech_angel, last night, for many, many hours, about the little things bothering me, and finally hitting at the root of the Larger thing, and, in terms of solurions? There really haven't been any, yet. The main problem, you ask? I've said it, before, and i guess i'll say it again, if that's necessary. (Stabbing Westward - [What Do I Have To Do?]). I'm fucking lonely, kids! I am, at a dep and core level, feeling a sense of disparity and alienation, and, sometimes, simple physical distance, from the people about whom i could care."For a crowd is not company; and faces are but a gallery of pictures; and talk but a tinkling cymbal, where there is no love." Sir Francis Bacon wrote that. (Johnny Cash - [The Man Comes Around]). I know a lot of people. I know them because i want to know them. I've said that before, too. I've drawn myself to them, because i liked them, felt we had something to offer each other, as a whole. Not simply on the short term. But, in many cases, everyone i thought a Friend, has now taken the level of damn near casual acquaintance. There are walls in place, and i don't know what built them...
I was... half asleep, maybe, or all the way asleep, or fully awake. I don't remember, now. But i saw walls, made of various types of things, sectioning off ideas, and people, from each other. The ones i hadn't built were made of Metal, smooth, and even, with no weaknesses, on my side. (Crash Test Dummies - [Afternoons & Coffeespoons]). The ones i had built were made of mortared stone, easily torn down, or pried apart, at the cracks. Only waiting. The others... all i could do was bang on the walls, and hope that someone realised that someone was trying to come through.
I don't fully remember my dreams, from last night, but i know that they were all about interpresonal relationships, and how i try to know people... The feeling reminiscent of old school dreams, of mine. I think one took place in the Office Building, in my head. Preparing for something. Something in the air smells and tastes of familiar fruit and sweetness...
Praxis - [Interface-Stimulation Loop]--- A kind of flower, one which i haven't had the experience of smelling in many, many years... Very odd. Well, I hope that today's activities go well, and that i can have a few more good conversations, everywhere. That kind of thing.
And now, i think that i'm off for a shower. Later all.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-04-24 10:18 am (UTC)I'm starting to think that you're my evil mirror image. Or I'm yours.
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So far as evil goes, i think that, of necessity, there's a mix. Heheh.
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Date: 2004-04-24 09:07 pm (UTC)Everything can be Beaten. ^_^
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