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i'm really getting sick and tired of these bad days. i'm thinking of taking Jeremy's advice, and having at the universe. Though not being able to destroy it would only make me feel worse...Heh. Had a few thoughts on the Cassandra Complex earlier today. Here they are:

In Greek Mythos, Cassandra was cursed to Always know the future, and to always be ignored by those who sought her. If you can't figure out why i would be thinking about this, you obviously don't know me very well. Now, in modern society, the term Cassandra Complex is used to describe someone with "apocalyptic delusions" of the future, and these people are generally dissueded of them. Does this seem a tad bit off, to anyone else?

Why name a "Dysfunction" after something dealing with someone who was RIGHT in their "Delusions," but to whom no one LISTENED?! Why Shoot yourself in the Foot, like that? You set yourself up for the role of the idiot hubrist, when you do that. It doesn't make any sense, to me. People suck.

i didn't go to my last periiod class today. i simply was not in the mood for it. Went over to some friends' house, watched movies, ate dinner. Drank Bailey's. That made me feel better. Went out to lunch, earlier today, and had a nice long talk with a friend, about stuff i don't normally get to talk about. New perspectives and such. : )

Anyway, i had this dream, last nyte: My roomate and i are in a marta station, and there are all of these millitary types around. They're doing marching formations, and manoeuvers, and he and i figure that we should do the same, in order to not get shot. So we end up marching into the train, and, somehow, they figure that we aren't supposed to be there. They put us in a differrent car than the soliders, and the car happens to be a full-sized WWII concentration camp.

We're in the Concentration Camp, and we're old men. We're surrounded by old Jewish and German men, now, and we're planning an escape. We escape, and the train car concentration camp is now a dinghy, from a cruise ship, and we're on the water. We're trying to row to freedom, and we see an island in the distance. We're on the side of a highway. We decide that we're going to have to row on the highway, specifically in the middle lane. My roomate says to me, "We can't do that. The SS have these new cars, and they'll find us." So i sayeth unto him, "Dood, the government is stupid: All the cars will look the same, and we'll see them coming." So we go

i'm in a car, driving this girl to her wedding. As a dream, i remember having been at her wedding before, and something going wrong. She needs to find a wedding ring, and get to the church, before everyone leaves. Back to the Nazi part, i'm a superhero, fighting the Nazi's, to save the old men. i wake up

i feel ill. i need to go to bed soon. There are people in my life that i really love. There are people in my life who i can't wait to see, in person. There are those, in my life, whom i never really talk to, anymore. There are those with whom i'm forging new friendships. There are those with whom it is getting to be more trouble, than it is worth. Figure it out, or ask.

i want to be with my friends. i want to hang out with my friends. i want to see and be with and connect with and engender healthy relatiionships with my friends. i HAVE a LOT of FRIENDS!! i am SORRY that i cannot devote all of my tyme to all of you. i WOULD if i COULD. But there are acertain constraints that the universe places, which i find myself following out of force of habit. Tyme, being one of them. If you all would like to all get together, meet one another, hang out, all at once, and have weekly therapy sessions or WHATEVER, WOOHOO!! GREAT!!!! BRING IT ON!! But SOME of you don't like each other. SOME of you live in other states and countries, and SOME of you... fuck, i don't know WHAT your deal is... But whatever, right? Let's not worry about it, till Wolven explodes again. Then we can all do something to placate him, so he stops yelling for a moment. Right? Right.

i want to be there for everyone. i want to be able to be my deffinition of a Friend to Everyone about whom i care. Fuck it. Whatever.

***We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming of ineffectual communication. Had this been a real cry for help, attention, sympathy, comanionship, and or empathy, it would have been accompannied by screaming, and out pourings of emtion.***

Good Nytes. Good Days. Dream Well

Me again

Date: 2002-02-06 11:52 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I agree with him, I mean there are some days when I wonder what the heck ppl are thinking when they tell you things, I mean what do you do when someone is supposed to be your friend and they get mad at you for doing something that your normally do, and then there goes your day. Its even worse when someone that says they are your friend and they get mad at you because of something you say in jest.....I hate ppl sometimes, I miss my friends, thou now a days its not all that many, but I mean if they cant take you for everything you are, say, do, and stuff then they really arent your friend.........oh well....Im gonna go to bed, seem wolven and I are in the same boat, in that we have upset tummies, and we both believe that light cigs are evil!!!!!



To quote Elvira Mistress of the Dark: Unpleasant Dreams kiddies!!

you figured ME out...

Date: 2002-02-07 05:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-hothead-yet.livejournal.com
the reason I picked the name "Cassandra" is exactly the REAL meaning of the name. I have never prophesyzed doom per se, but I got completely sick of telling people what I clearly see to be in motion only to be dismissed and/or ignored.... then later I get to hear them say "hey wow....." but they still never seem to realize I warned them ahead of time. This is particularly true of my ex-husband.

I wanted to remind myself of this truism: People don't want to hear the truth. They tell you they do, but they really, REALLY don't.

Take your time wolven. The world chugs along like a 69 vega whether or not you want to jump in and go for a spin today.

Some of us are still here.

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