In other news:

"Fallen" is on. This goes on the list. I need things, with Christ's Mass coming, and all. Whee! Materialism.

So many movies, with friends in them. ^_^

Got a feeling.

Belly - [Low Red Moon]--- It's seasonal. There are cyclical changes, here, and the idea of me wanting conversations, and comradeship always come in winter. It's cold, and dark, sooner, and i find friends in those places. Those things. But the here holds less and less.

It's the effort that does it. The thought of what lengths we all have to take to get next to one another, and then that's not enough, when it's accomplished. There's that want for the other to relate on the level. Our level. People wonder why i can't just shut the fuck up and enjoy things-- turn my mind off, and let it ride, and i hate that. I hate it, because it feels like ignoring it. When i know that it's in the passive processing centre of my brain, i know that some part of me is working on solutions, if slowly. As my dad put it, last night, "Quality processing." Not always appreciated in institutionalised settings, he said, but deffinately important to do.

I've got this feeling, right now, like something devistating is around the corner. Like it's waiting for me to get comfortable, and then it's going to jump out at me, and scare the bollocks off of me. (Poe & Mark Danielewski - [Hey Pretty (Remix)]). Maybe more than scare. It's a fucked up feeling, because there's a numbness to it, and i think "Another glorious November." But it still worries... There's one unequivocally good thing about November, for me, this year. Happy birthday, love....

I say it's seasonal, because take a look back, in the archives, this time last year. I did, last night. I was talking about the exact same shit. Just another permutation of the difficulty. A lack of it, en total, and me not fully understanding why i wanted what i wanted. But i know, now. And last night i had some conversations that got some things done...

The White Stripes - [Fell in Love With a Girl]--- Just your morning, or afternoon, update. I'm done now.

Again, happy birthday, mech_angel, and infinitely many more. I'm just sorry i can't give you your present, in person.

Later all.

{2.03pm: Rush - [Freewill]--- In other news: Are we surprised?


You're Pinhead. As the head of the Church of
Sorrow, you are an excellent leader. You know
how to keep your minions under control (whether
by fear or respect), and conversely, keep them
happy by giving them what they want. You
personify the perfect mixture of fear and
adoration. Just as pain and pleasure are
indivisible in your doctrine, so are those two
qualities in your followers.


Which Cenobite are you? (includes pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla

Quiz ganked from mech_angel.}

Because i don't want to keep forgetting:

Party, at my place, in one week. Be there.

Fucking...

Collective Soul - [Run]--- I'm sitting here, with this cloud looming, and something feels fucking horrible. Terrible. My mom asked a very euphemistic question, tonight: "Is your friend still coming down, next month?" She always terms "romantic interest" as "friend," when she's unclear as to the nature of things, and doesn't feel comfortable asking, because she thinks it'll make me uncomfortable. (Nellie McKay - [I Wanna Get Married]). Of course, she meant mech_angel, but the question is, where did she get the idea that she was coming down, next month?

I don't know if i gave her the idea, or if she had some other source of information. The fucked up thing is, i feel like it's something that should be happening, and maybe it is. Will. Whatever. One can dream.

Bobgoblin - [Pretty In My Uniform]--- You ever get the idea to just form a Legion, raise the ranks of Hell, and sweep across the face of the globe, destroying anything that stands in your way, and changing whatever's amenable to being changed, just to show people that "Look, I know the supernatural is something that isn't supposed to happen, but it does happen," and because you feel you deserve to, if only just the once?

Me neither....

I'm out.

{11.40pm: Try not to be paranoid or suspicious, WOLVEN. The energy of the day could make you feel a little nervous. You might wonder if your nervous system is reacting to something toxic in your environment. Or you could be concerned that you are picking up bad vibes from someone nearby. None of these things are true. Planetary energy could be making you a bit edgy or restless. So try to remain relaxed.

Gary Numan - [Down In The Park]--- Ha, fucking ha, guys. Thanks for the heads up, though. It remains to be seen.}