A thing you'll do today: Pride
Feb. 28th, 2011 01:21 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wolven7Tell me something you've done, recently, of which you are most proud.
Tell me something you've done that's made you feel awesome.
Don't give me any bullshit about not having done anything. Don't try to tell me you don't do anything.
You do many things, and many of those many are quite amazing.
Take a step outside yourself, and look at yourself from someone else's perspective today.
Make a mirror trap for their perceptions, a doorway through which you can enter their perspective.
Now ask the question: What do you that others find awe-inspiring? What do you do that is amazing?
Today I want you to Imagine a house. Construct it, in your mind and fill it with as many rooms as you need, of which ever types you find most appealing. In each of these rooms is a different... not a memory, but a conception. A contextual construction of references, relationships, and ideas. A point of view.
Let me help you open the doors and windows of your house, today. Let some fresh air in, and clear out the dust and cobwebs, so that new spiders can build new strands, new webs of connection to thoughtfully trap their prey. Your prey. (You're prey.)
You'd pay for this kind of service, but you don't have to. You don't even have to understake the project, if you don't want to. You can just let it the wind blow through shutters and shake your foundations, but I have to say it's easier if you open the wonders. Windows. Anyway.
There is something you have done of which you're proud. Think about it, today, tonight, whenever it is.
Think about it, and tell me what it is. More importantly, tell yourself what it is. Remember what kind of thing it is, how it rings in your mind like a clear bell, and then search for that kind of resonance, again and again. Not the same note. Not the same tone. But that quality of feeling.
Tell me what it is, and make sure you find it as often as you can.
Tell me something you've done that's made you feel awesome.
Don't give me any bullshit about not having done anything. Don't try to tell me you don't do anything.
You do many things, and many of those many are quite amazing.
Take a step outside yourself, and look at yourself from someone else's perspective today.
Make a mirror trap for their perceptions, a doorway through which you can enter their perspective.
Now ask the question: What do you that others find awe-inspiring? What do you do that is amazing?
Today I want you to Imagine a house. Construct it, in your mind and fill it with as many rooms as you need, of which ever types you find most appealing. In each of these rooms is a different... not a memory, but a conception. A contextual construction of references, relationships, and ideas. A point of view.
Let me help you open the doors and windows of your house, today. Let some fresh air in, and clear out the dust and cobwebs, so that new spiders can build new strands, new webs of connection to thoughtfully trap their prey. Your prey. (You're prey.)
You'd pay for this kind of service, but you don't have to. You don't even have to understake the project, if you don't want to. You can just let it the wind blow through shutters and shake your foundations, but I have to say it's easier if you open the wonders. Windows. Anyway.
There is something you have done of which you're proud. Think about it, today, tonight, whenever it is.
Think about it, and tell me what it is. More importantly, tell yourself what it is. Remember what kind of thing it is, how it rings in your mind like a clear bell, and then search for that kind of resonance, again and again. Not the same note. Not the same tone. But that quality of feeling.
Tell me what it is, and make sure you find it as often as you can.
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no subject
Date: 2011-02-28 07:52 pm (UTC)Apparently I got upgraded from background extra to featured on my first pro job, by making a simple but good suggestion to the AD for a shot I was in. I was actually more proud of how the job went on the night than of the much later discovery of the increased pay, though that's pretty excellent too.
I'm proud like Satan of the salad I made for Amanda Palmer. Also quite proud I fit my whole FX workshop in my suitcase with room left for some clothing, and proud of how preternaturally organised I am with this going overseas thing. Proud of how well my facepainting job on Saturday went. Proud of the passages I wrote this afternoon while sitting on the floor of a bookshop.
I like to pick out points of pride as a matter of routine. I got tired of making myself small.
no subject
Date: 2011-02-28 07:55 pm (UTC)Fuck it.
Date: 2011-02-28 11:26 pm (UTC)Tell me something you've done, recently, of which you are most proud. I went to, completed, and excelled in Graduate School, and then proceeded to, without actually having graduated yet, get a job in my profession of choice, in a field of my choice, and in a location of my choice.
Tell me something you've done that's made you feel awesome. I put in most of the pages of the yearbook pictures and felt really awesome about the fact that I had enough pictures to mostly do so.
Don't give me any bullshit about not having done anything. Don't try to tell me you don't do anything. I do many things on a daily basis, maybe not a bunch of things that I'm proud of, but many things. Fuck it, I came up with a new story (that I'll probably never really share) that I'm in love with right now and really enjoying playing with the world of.
You do many things, and many of those many are quite amazing. Yep.
Take a step outside yourself, and look at yourself from someone else's perspective today.
Make a mirror trap for their perceptions, a doorway through which you can enter their perspective.
Now ask the question: What do you that others find awe-inspiring? What do you do that is amazing? Things that other people have told me were amazing? I went to Japan because I wanted to and came back. I'm working in my field. I'm putting up with tons and tons of bullshit because I love my kids and I WANT to be a fucking educator. I'm putting together a yearbook. I can seem so sure of myself and so together. I am kind and caring and can take apart a situation from a fucked up perspective. Give me ten minutes and I'll give you a better poem than you can make in 3 hours (no, not you, or you, or even you, but definitely the person whose told me this). I am a keeper and taker and sharer of stories. I can look on the bright side of JUST ABOUT FUCKING ANYTHING. I can see spaces and designes and ideas in my mind and have them actually turn out the way I've seen in my head, and yes, I was right, the chair should totally go there, and the table over there. I can drive with no hands. I can type without looking and really fucking fast. I've walked in different countries where I did not know the main language and I was FINE. I've read over 100 books for the last 3 years. I'm a good problem solver. I can speak 2 1/4 langauges. I can fucking write.
Today I want you to Imagine a house. Construct it, in your mind and fill it with as many rooms as you need, of which ever types you find most appealing. In each of these rooms is a different... not a memory, but a conception. A contextual construction of references, relationships, and ideas. A point of view.
Let me help you open the doors and windows of your house, today. Let some fresh air in, and clear out the dust and cobwebs, so that new spiders can build new strands, new webs of connection to thoughtfully trap their prey. Your prey. (You're prey.)
You'd pay for this kind of service, but you don't have to. You don't even have to understake the project, if you don't want to. You can just let it the wind blow through shutters and shake your foundations, but I have to say it's easier if you open the wonders. Windows. Anyway.
There is something you have done of which you're proud. Think about it, today, tonight, whenever it is.
Think about it, and tell me what it is. More importantly, tell yourself what it is. Remember what kind of thing it is, how it rings in your mind like a clear bell, and then search for that kind of resonance, again and again. Not the same note. Not the same tone. But that quality of feeling.
Tell me what it is, and make sure you find it as often as you can.
I needed that. After coming home crying and feeling totally inadequate, I really fucking needed that. Thank you. Love you.
Re: Fuck it.
Date: 2011-03-01 03:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-28 11:46 pm (UTC)Today, I am proud of my journey. There are elements of that journey I will never be proud of, but it certainly feels empowering to be on the safe side of my alcoholism, and having done it mostly through my own willpower and desire to live my life, instead of just existing through it. I’m not out of the woods yet, I think alcohol will always present a danger to me, but drinking has changed for me, because I am no longer using it to destroy myself. I like myself for the first time I can ever really recall, and because of that, alcohol has an entirely different effect on me now – the oblivion scares me, instead of feeling like home. This is what feels great.
What are you proud of, Damien?
no subject
Date: 2011-03-01 02:26 am (UTC)My shallow answer
Date: 2011-03-01 04:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-01 04:27 pm (UTC)Cooking, game design and dance are qualities that others have declared as awesome. My willingness to help people regardless of personal benefit (it usually does end up benefiting me eventually in social capital, but that's a different topic). And a scant handful have found my brainmeats fascinating. I'm also assuming the humor and massage are appreciated.