Emotionally Unavailable
Nov. 12th, 2002 11:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wolven7Spinning around and turning into the things we hate the most, watching our brothers' motions and machinations, only to realise that the things we hold close, are the things we might want to throw away. Sometimes. When do we pay attention to the facets of reality that show us the ways to be? Can we not notice ourselves, because we're too busy trying to find the ways to pretend not to notice each other? So we throw away the things we worked for. And the things we want.
There are certain types of little death that can open the barrier, and rip away the plastic covers. We can know what surgical precision lies beneath the sterilized wrappings, and decide to hone that edge, for what it is. And we lose people, in the process. Too bad. We are ourselves, and there will be nothing else. Decide, and that is not what it takes, ever. There is a subtle, internal shift, and you'll never notice it, until you've been working within it, for months, and years, and seconds, and Ticks. Because, then, and with the Divine Intervention of Your Will, Alone, you can be subconsciously moved, on a musical-molecular, Song-like level, into doing the things that you want and Need for yourself.
Truth. Because it's the hardest way, and you have to fool yourself, by staring at the scenery, and not looking down the road you want to take, because the rocks will scare the shit out of you, and the razorblade kisses will drain the strength out of you... But you're replaced with the strength of knowing that, no matter what else may happen, you no longer have anything to lose. And never think about it.
Note it, and move on. Stare at your flowers. Smell your roses. Speak your mind... Honestly.
Always.
There are certain types of little death that can open the barrier, and rip away the plastic covers. We can know what surgical precision lies beneath the sterilized wrappings, and decide to hone that edge, for what it is. And we lose people, in the process. Too bad. We are ourselves, and there will be nothing else. Decide, and that is not what it takes, ever. There is a subtle, internal shift, and you'll never notice it, until you've been working within it, for months, and years, and seconds, and Ticks. Because, then, and with the Divine Intervention of Your Will, Alone, you can be subconsciously moved, on a musical-molecular, Song-like level, into doing the things that you want and Need for yourself.
Truth. Because it's the hardest way, and you have to fool yourself, by staring at the scenery, and not looking down the road you want to take, because the rocks will scare the shit out of you, and the razorblade kisses will drain the strength out of you... But you're replaced with the strength of knowing that, no matter what else may happen, you no longer have anything to lose. And never think about it.
Note it, and move on. Stare at your flowers. Smell your roses. Speak your mind... Honestly.
Always.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2002-11-12 10:05 pm (UTC)People dont always want to hear the truth.
no matter how much they say they do.
Those few who have had the stamina, courage, will power, foolhardiness, stupidity, masochisim, to run the path with me, surprise me. And i find myself thankful to the gods for their company. i, forget, all too easily, the goodness which others bring; Forget my desire to make the connections to others which i so need and crave. There's just some things you wake up knowing, and other things you have to learn. no one is spared.
--JMDC
I Do.
I would never ask to be told the Truth, if i wasn't asking From The Truth... And why would anyone else?
Sadly... i know why...
Hrm..
Date: 2002-11-13 11:15 am (UTC)-Mech
Re: Hrm..
Date: 2002-11-13 09:22 pm (UTC)cheer up emo kid!
Date: 2002-11-13 03:36 pm (UTC)Re: cheer up emo kid!
Re: cheer up emo kid!
Date: 2002-11-15 04:10 pm (UTC)