Chrysanthemum
Oct. 15th, 2002 01:33 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wolven7Luxt - [Zero]--- I'm in an... odd... mood... i haven't been feeling quite myself, recently, and i don't know what's going on... i feel as if there is something going on, on a subconscious level, to which i am not privy... That feeling sucks... a lot... It makes me very nervous, and i want to know when i'm going to have the time, or the focus, to go look at whatever the Hell it is that's doing this to me...It's probably something i'm doing to myself, on some level... i'm trying to find a focus, and a way, within myself.... but with the shite going on, around me, lately, i haven't really felt like giving that much of a damn... It's so difficult... to explain.
I'm wandering around, through my psyche, trying to figure out that which is mine, and that which is from elsewhere, around me. I haven't simply sat, and meditated, in far too long, and my lack of art is starting to make me edgy, and nervous. I'm going through my day, as rote, and i'm saying and doing things that i then have to stop and think about, if only for a millisecond, in my head, to figure out what the fuck it was that i just said. I'm not liking this, and it's causing me to Doubt Myself. It must Die, or be Changed. But now, perhaps, you think that i'm talking like an insane person. But i don't care.. This Clive Barker thing looks... Good... "Saintsinner".. Shit.... i'm going to Hell... Like, not out of sinful living, but out of necessity... Demons, and all... Tyme to Make the Donuts... Uhm...
The predatory nature, of Me, has been supremely active, lately. It wants things, and is fairly certain that it can get whatever it is that it wants. I like the feeling... but, at what price? I feel like some intricate thing, unfolding, and blossoming, and allowing new petals, crevices, and folds to be flowed upon and into by the dark effulgence of the sun that is my Self. Unfolding myself, to myself, to discover what i already know.... Complexity... Simplicity... Darkness.. Light..
My Horror Scope for today Change isn't something that comes easily for you, Wolven. You often worry about how things will turn out if you have to change jobs or relationships. But over time, you've probably seen that change helps you to grow, and although it can be scary at first, eventually things work out okay. Today you could be concerned about a change that is happening in your life. Try to relax and let yourself go with the flow.
..........No FUCKING Comment, other than this: Change comes Easily to those with no Restraint. We've had that discussion. Here, have a damned link: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/news/archive/2002/10/14/national1846EDT0693.DTL
It's about why this "Sniper", in D.C. couldn't hold his shit together, with all the Force-Like power of all the Duct Tape, in a freak's garage. Read it, and enjoy. For those of you who have seen Red Dragon, some tactics should stand out.
I'm going to go, now, and try to find something to do, with the reading of things and oddments. I may be back, later. I have to be up, at 11.00, so that i can go look at a damned apartment. Then try to make it to class on time. *sigh* Good luck Wolven....
in case i don't come back, tonight,
Dream Well
I'm wandering around, through my psyche, trying to figure out that which is mine, and that which is from elsewhere, around me. I haven't simply sat, and meditated, in far too long, and my lack of art is starting to make me edgy, and nervous. I'm going through my day, as rote, and i'm saying and doing things that i then have to stop and think about, if only for a millisecond, in my head, to figure out what the fuck it was that i just said. I'm not liking this, and it's causing me to Doubt Myself. It must Die, or be Changed. But now, perhaps, you think that i'm talking like an insane person. But i don't care.. This Clive Barker thing looks... Good... "Saintsinner".. Shit.... i'm going to Hell... Like, not out of sinful living, but out of necessity... Demons, and all... Tyme to Make the Donuts... Uhm...
The predatory nature, of Me, has been supremely active, lately. It wants things, and is fairly certain that it can get whatever it is that it wants. I like the feeling... but, at what price? I feel like some intricate thing, unfolding, and blossoming, and allowing new petals, crevices, and folds to be flowed upon and into by the dark effulgence of the sun that is my Self. Unfolding myself, to myself, to discover what i already know.... Complexity... Simplicity... Darkness.. Light..
My Horror Scope for today Change isn't something that comes easily for you, Wolven. You often worry about how things will turn out if you have to change jobs or relationships. But over time, you've probably seen that change helps you to grow, and although it can be scary at first, eventually things work out okay. Today you could be concerned about a change that is happening in your life. Try to relax and let yourself go with the flow.
..........No FUCKING Comment, other than this: Change comes Easily to those with no Restraint. We've had that discussion. Here, have a damned link: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/news/archive/2002/10/14/national1846EDT0693.DTL
It's about why this "Sniper", in D.C. couldn't hold his shit together, with all the Force-Like power of all the Duct Tape, in a freak's garage. Read it, and enjoy. For those of you who have seen Red Dragon, some tactics should stand out.
I'm going to go, now, and try to find something to do, with the reading of things and oddments. I may be back, later. I have to be up, at 11.00, so that i can go look at a damned apartment. Then try to make it to class on time. *sigh* Good luck Wolven....
in case i don't come back, tonight,
Dream Well
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2002-10-14 10:45 pm (UTC)no subject
no subject
Date: 2002-10-14 10:52 pm (UTC)no subject
no subject
Date: 2002-10-14 11:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Green Ducks in your Pants
Date: 2002-10-14 11:20 pm (UTC)I seem to be at something of the same point, but there also seems to be a difference. You're viewing these new facets as interlopers and therefore going at it with 'search and destroy' mode. It's more interesting and pelasant if it's in 'treasure hunt' mode. Where you're not liking the Hunt for self-discovery, maybe you should. Those weird bits may be new parts of your Self and therefore finding them and understanding them should be like finding new pockets in a coat someone gave you, and hoping they left a few bucks in it. :)
-Mech
Re: Green Ducks in your Pants
no subject
Date: 2002-10-15 08:44 am (UTC)no subject
well...
Date: 2002-10-16 09:42 am (UTC)Re: well...
Date: 2002-10-16 09:30 pm (UTC)