Blunt truth.
Aug. 19th, 2007 12:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wolven7I talk to you for a reason. There is something in our relationship that I need and feel I can't get, the same way, anywhere else. I need to talk to you, because you are you, and you give me a perspective that, at the moment, no one else can (it's the combination I focus on, most often; the differences in infinity, because the samenesses are obvious). I need you, I want you, because you Are You, because you say things, and choose words the way no one else does.
I remember people from my past, for the same reason, and in my ,most recent bout of will-he-won't-he-rejoin-the-dance I realised something: There are some people that i just don't want or need, anymore. They've slipped away, they're gone, and I've tried (Lords know I've tried) to reconnect and re-attach, but my efforts aren't matched. And so Fuck Them. Not really, because I still love them, care for them, and I'd still be fucked up, inside, if I were to find out, tomorrow, that they'd died, but other than that, Fuck Them. There's no reason to continually torment myself with memories of the past that are supposed to be a source of happiness. There's no reason to taint that by trying to recaputure a wave-form that's slipped back into the probabilistic soup. It just causes problems.
I've found people. I Can Find People, as I need to, if I need to. Resources are at all of our disposal to know anything about anyone, unfortunately, as long as we have a little bit of information, already. A name, an e-mail address, a parent's name, a high school. You can find who you want and who you need. It's not hard, anymore. Which is unfortunate, because now we can stare, forlornly, at someone's MySuck, FailBook, Twatter, HellJay, or Blagger page, for hours, reading about them, thinking about what used to be, and what could have been, rather than saying "Fuck! That sure was fun, back then, and I'll never forget them, and I'll treasure those memories for-fucking-ever! Well, time to go live the rest of my life!"
Keep old contacts. Enemiees, friends, acquaintances, liquor-store owners, whatever. They all have somemthing to offer youu, that no one else can, and that should be treasured. But if they're gone? If they've gone, and you've tried to get them back, and nothing comes of it? Well, then, they're gone, aren't they? And it's time to find the next thing you need, that no one else can give you.
No you aren't replacing your friends. Haven't you been listening? No one can ever take someone else's place, in your mind, your heart, because their symbol is a very specific combination of things, that no one else will fully map. They may resonant, or partially isomorph onto parts of each other, but it is most likely that, if you're really paying attention, no one will do the same thing for you as someone else. And that's wonderful.
So I've let go of the one's I don't need, anymore, or who don't need me. I'm still tending to, or trying to tend to the ones that still hold, and I think, in the end, it'll work out.
Ta.
"Now taint the universe with the flavor of your game,
tilt reality around the ball to shape the lane
of its travel. But do not let it unravel fate:
don't return a volley if it's already too late."
I remember people from my past, for the same reason, and in my ,most recent bout of will-he-won't-he-rejoin-the-dance I realised something: There are some people that i just don't want or need, anymore. They've slipped away, they're gone, and I've tried (Lords know I've tried) to reconnect and re-attach, but my efforts aren't matched. And so Fuck Them. Not really, because I still love them, care for them, and I'd still be fucked up, inside, if I were to find out, tomorrow, that they'd died, but other than that, Fuck Them. There's no reason to continually torment myself with memories of the past that are supposed to be a source of happiness. There's no reason to taint that by trying to recaputure a wave-form that's slipped back into the probabilistic soup. It just causes problems.
I've found people. I Can Find People, as I need to, if I need to. Resources are at all of our disposal to know anything about anyone, unfortunately, as long as we have a little bit of information, already. A name, an e-mail address, a parent's name, a high school. You can find who you want and who you need. It's not hard, anymore. Which is unfortunate, because now we can stare, forlornly, at someone's MySuck, FailBook, Twatter, HellJay, or Blagger page, for hours, reading about them, thinking about what used to be, and what could have been, rather than saying "Fuck! That sure was fun, back then, and I'll never forget them, and I'll treasure those memories for-fucking-ever! Well, time to go live the rest of my life!"
Keep old contacts. Enemiees, friends, acquaintances, liquor-store owners, whatever. They all have somemthing to offer youu, that no one else can, and that should be treasured. But if they're gone? If they've gone, and you've tried to get them back, and nothing comes of it? Well, then, they're gone, aren't they? And it's time to find the next thing you need, that no one else can give you.
No you aren't replacing your friends. Haven't you been listening? No one can ever take someone else's place, in your mind, your heart, because their symbol is a very specific combination of things, that no one else will fully map. They may resonant, or partially isomorph onto parts of each other, but it is most likely that, if you're really paying attention, no one will do the same thing for you as someone else. And that's wonderful.
So I've let go of the one's I don't need, anymore, or who don't need me. I'm still tending to, or trying to tend to the ones that still hold, and I think, in the end, it'll work out.
Ta.
"Now taint the universe with the flavor of your game,
tilt reality around the ball to shape the lane
of its travel. But do not let it unravel fate:
don't return a volley if it's already too late."
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no subject
Date: 2007-08-19 07:39 pm (UTC)Thanks, I needed that.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-19 08:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-19 07:52 pm (UTC)ya did miss me -blush-
no subject
Date: 2007-08-19 08:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-20 12:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-20 04:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-21 02:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-21 02:37 pm (UTC)We do miss you, a bit, around here.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-22 12:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-22 12:41 am (UTC)