Something...
Aug. 25th, 2003 02:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wolven7Save Ferris - [Come On Eileen]-- Building... slowly, tightly, winding.. Peeling away the facades of itself, eveything in its true colours, and sometimes angerbloodvulnerableinsides red Is my trueth. And i don't know what to do about it. (Moxy Früvous - [King of Spain]). I can't think too well, right now.. And i know that, tomorrow, it all starts again. It's days of trying to see people, and nights of nothing to do. Trying to fit work in there, and then trying to understand why things have to be difficult, as is. Why we have to appreciate the schism.
"What kind of universe would give me the power to extract Souls from people's BODIES, but still force me to work a suck-ass job, if i wanna eat?" - Georgia (George), "Dead Like Me"
And yeah, i know i quoted it, before, but it never Ceases being appropriate, in its context. That's kind of the Thing about context, yes? Yes. (Sigur Rós - [Mistur]). And tomorrow is school... And maybe that has something to do with it all..
Tomorrow, as i said, is expectations, and people haven't seen me in months, and some could only cursorily care, when they did, and that's really kind of fine, because who can care for everyone, all the time, with out that love and care turning to a sort of clamping controling restrictive obsession hate? (Darkest of the Hillside Thickets - [Diggin' Up The World]). Not Many. And that's quite fine. I'm ok, there.... But everyone knows bits and pieces of everyone, and no one is ever thought of as highly as they (probably) deserve. This came from my conversation with Al, last night. People sell people short, because we get to know pieces, or we understand to a point, and we don't try anymore...
But like Calvin noted, too many perspectives can be paralyzing. Not really. Movement in the self[-/,]centred. And that makes it all ok. I sing the spring. (Carmina Burana - [Veris Leta Facies]). If and when it comes from inside, and is pure, there, it makes things work more.. well.. the striving, for it.. The noting when things are going bad. The Fixing them. But not everyone is there... And that's ok. You have to let it be. Or it'll kill you, or Them. You know? I've rambled, a bit, right?
I need to buy DragonCon tickets, tomorrow. I do want to go... but it seems a tad silly... the chances are slim. And so on.
AS i was saying, there's that gap, and that schism, and school is tomorrow, and i, once looked forward to it. I've no Philosophy clsses, this semester. Nothing but PoliSci, Film, and, of course, German... And i hope those will be enough... Next semester is the Sciences and Maths semester... Woohoo.
Snake River Conspiracy - [Vulcan]--- WAndering around, inside my head, and i hate quitting smoking, because it leaves you open to all kinds of horrid respiratory illnesses. I've a Sinus infection, at the moment, and some kind of bronchial thing. And the schedules are all off. Wonder who i'll run into, tomorrow, to make all the worry and the wonder worth my while...
These are the thoughts in my brain, the night before classes start. Technology's having a bit of an Issue... Something needs to be done.. to calm the public. Fear is the mindkiller. Fear is a Teacher, if you'd shut up and learn the lessons, instead of gibbering and screaming like some kind of rabid vanilla poisoned monkey...
Shit. I should Sleep, if i want to get up, and do the things i want to do, for tomorrow, that will get me there, on time. Early. See people. Hang around. Shift-less. In which case, i'm out.
Dream Well
"What kind of universe would give me the power to extract Souls from people's BODIES, but still force me to work a suck-ass job, if i wanna eat?" - Georgia (George), "Dead Like Me"
And yeah, i know i quoted it, before, but it never Ceases being appropriate, in its context. That's kind of the Thing about context, yes? Yes. (Sigur Rós - [Mistur]). And tomorrow is school... And maybe that has something to do with it all..
Tomorrow, as i said, is expectations, and people haven't seen me in months, and some could only cursorily care, when they did, and that's really kind of fine, because who can care for everyone, all the time, with out that love and care turning to a sort of clamping controling restrictive obsession hate? (Darkest of the Hillside Thickets - [Diggin' Up The World]). Not Many. And that's quite fine. I'm ok, there.... But everyone knows bits and pieces of everyone, and no one is ever thought of as highly as they (probably) deserve. This came from my conversation with Al, last night. People sell people short, because we get to know pieces, or we understand to a point, and we don't try anymore...
But like Calvin noted, too many perspectives can be paralyzing. Not really. Movement in the self[-/,]centred. And that makes it all ok. I sing the spring. (Carmina Burana - [Veris Leta Facies]). If and when it comes from inside, and is pure, there, it makes things work more.. well.. the striving, for it.. The noting when things are going bad. The Fixing them. But not everyone is there... And that's ok. You have to let it be. Or it'll kill you, or Them. You know? I've rambled, a bit, right?
I need to buy DragonCon tickets, tomorrow. I do want to go... but it seems a tad silly... the chances are slim. And so on.
AS i was saying, there's that gap, and that schism, and school is tomorrow, and i, once looked forward to it. I've no Philosophy clsses, this semester. Nothing but PoliSci, Film, and, of course, German... And i hope those will be enough... Next semester is the Sciences and Maths semester... Woohoo.
Snake River Conspiracy - [Vulcan]--- WAndering around, inside my head, and i hate quitting smoking, because it leaves you open to all kinds of horrid respiratory illnesses. I've a Sinus infection, at the moment, and some kind of bronchial thing. And the schedules are all off. Wonder who i'll run into, tomorrow, to make all the worry and the wonder worth my while...
These are the thoughts in my brain, the night before classes start. Technology's having a bit of an Issue... Something needs to be done.. to calm the public. Fear is the mindkiller. Fear is a Teacher, if you'd shut up and learn the lessons, instead of gibbering and screaming like some kind of rabid vanilla poisoned monkey...
Shit. I should Sleep, if i want to get up, and do the things i want to do, for tomorrow, that will get me there, on time. Early. See people. Hang around. Shift-less. In which case, i'm out.
Dream Well
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Date: 2003-08-25 01:26 am (UTC)wow. you're right. my relationships fuck up because i care too much and then can't stand it when they reach that stage on both sides.
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Date: 2003-08-25 07:39 am (UTC)Anyway, I got so tired of waiting for people and something to do at nights I eventually got used to it. . .it's sad. Now if I have nothing to do I don't care. Usually now I just get sad at the friends who got mad at me because they never got back to me and thought I left them. (I hate drama, but I never talk about it because I hate it)
I was excited about school. . .(starts next Wednesday for me) but now it's looking like a mass of shit that is just going to close of my college career. Blah. I hate being in a bad mood, but I did want to comment. . .
Grumble.
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