Yes. And the serpentine lemniscates dance through my souls. Tell us something we don't know.

[wolven7]

How evil are you?

Another Entry taken from a mail, though modified. It's a bit of an old hat, but there's a bit of a new twist:

Have you ever felt as though your emotions, or Kinds or Displays of emotions were completely out of phase with almost Everyone in existence? That's how i feel right now. You'll get this, i hope: Say I like this girl. She's a great friend, and very interesting to talk to, because we argue about near everything. And, though i like her, i don't LIKE Like her, to coin a phrase. I could see myself Dating her, and i could see myself Not dating her-- which, personally, i think would be more healthy for all involved-- but, sex, at this juncture, is something i see myself sharing with people with whom i have emotional attachments. Friends are, at present, my strongest emotional attachments. I have no qualms with the idea of having sex with my friends. That doesn't mean i don't Care about them, or, even more absurd, the emotionality of the act, Itself. I care, very deeply, but in a completely different context, than a purely romantic feeling...

So, will this personage understand these things? Perhaps, and perhaps not. But the point is that there shall be not way to tell, unless the attempt is made. Is that not so, Captain William H. Harpoopsnick?

"Wy, hrh-Hmmm! Yes, yes, Hrm! Very true, indeed, Wolven. Quite right, quite right. Hrh-Hhhmm!"

Thank you, Dr Captain W.H. Harpoopsnick, D.D.S. onto the dreams. I don't remember last night's, very well.. but oh dear Gods, the night before...

I'm in a very large hotel, and there is a concert, going on, as well as some sort of Games. The games are a Hotel-Sized game of Risk, With the countries painted on the floors, and stages of the ballrooms. I'm walking through the rooms, looking for the actual concert, and i see the southern part of the United States, painted in part of a ballroom. The rest of it is in a different room, and i know that Europe takes up half of the floor space, of the hotel. I find the Concert, and it is in a Large concert hall. I'm seated in an upper balcony, with absinthetics, who is, at the same time, my friend James, and s/he/they look at me sternly, sneeringly, for being late. I look down to the stage, which is two tiered and is raised Up, from the seating area, and what would rightly be called balconies, and/or pits, hang from the side of it. Prince, who is also James Brown, comes on stage, and starts dancing around/having a seizure. He flips to the lower level of the stage, and then falls to the ground. He rolls/flips off the stage, and then lands, on his back, on one of the pit railings. We hear a snap, and ten he flips/slides into the balcony box, proper, and starts dancing around, and singing, in there. At this point, he is Only James Brown.

I'm in an open place, with what look to be American Western Frontier-style forts, set on the empty lots of a modern city scape. The tops of the logs are sharpened into spikes, and there are Pirates, in one of the forts. There are a young priest, and an old priest, and they are fighting, with swords. The young priest, from whose vantage, the story is told, is still fighting with the Catholic Church, while the Old Priest is on the side of the Pirates. They are fighting, and they have similar styles, but the young priest uses a katana, and the old priest, a rapier. At one point, one of the Pirates comes in, to try to help the Old Priest, and he gets his head cut off. Both priests Stop, say, in unison, "In Nomine Patri, et Feli, et Spiritus Sancti," cross themselves, and then start fighting, again. The old Priest has the young, and a disadvantage, and is slowly lowering a blade on his neck. The young priest, though, for some reason, cannot Die. So he says, "Just shoot me. Just fucking shoot me." There are no guns, that work, for some reason, and the Old Priest laughs, and lets him up. The young priest walks away, and the Old Priest tells every one to leave him alone. The Young Priest passes, on his right, a Pirate, cleaning a silver, sawed-off shotgun. He gets scared, starts running, places his hand on a section of wall, which swings down, and jumps down over the wall. He runs across the street, looking back over his shoulder, and seeing the Old Priest, sighting at him, with the gun, and ducks, on the side of the wall. Some people i know come up to the young priest, and ask him if everything's ok, he says yeah, and ducks into the shop, while they hold to door, for him.

Inside the shop, there are TVs on, and there are some sort of advertisements, that remind me of my aunt Mica, and her daughter. I realise that i'm still the young priest, see something, on a department store, round, chrome display stand, about the Dukes of Hazard, and i wake up

And THOSE were my dreams. Rock it, biznatch. Been having a bit of a govoreet, all on my oddy knocky, i have. Heheheh. Enjoy. Sorry about the Extreme lapses, between posts, but... Shit happens. Love you kids.

Dream Well

Comments

Hmm

[(Anonymous)]

Ok, time for me to go into my little odd emotional place about this sort of thing.

I have friends... and I have Friends...and I have everyone else who I have to deal with on a regular basis. As you well know, but your other loyal readers dont, I have this odd sort of inner circle of people I feel obliged to protect - my Friends. Right now, at current count, there are an all time high of eight of them, including my SO who is sort of a special case in this regard. So call it seven.

These are seven people which I feel not only obliged to protect, but so emotionally close to them that I have a very hard time explaining to people exactly what my feelings are towards them. These are people so close to me that I have no other word for it but to say I Love them. Because I do.

And its this emotional closeness that makes it very hard for me to draw lines in terms of physical closeness / emotional closeness with this innermost circle. Which of course, given the way our culture works, is VERY awkward and troublesome at times... especially given a very protective SO who wants me all to himself (not that I blame him).

These people are important in my life... people I have kept/will keep close to me for a very extended ammount of time... and I feel it is a shame that there has to be this boundary drawn on how far we can go as friends to express how close we are, or to comfort each other, or what not, because it is seen as "unnaceptable" to be physically close with people who are not your SO/whatever.

And I dont mean just sex! Sharing a bed, curling up close, sharing a touch, sharing a kiss... so many other things that we cant do to show someone how much we care about them, because those things are supposedly reserved for romantic love, not friendship.

And these things have caused me allot of trouble in my life, I will admit it. A missunderstood touch, a hug that was taken for more than it was... and more. Having to keep the lines drawn between Romantic Love and Friendship is a truely hard thing. Especially when you are in a committed exclusive relationship with a person who doesnt tollerate any real encroachment into what they consider theirs exclusivly.

Dont get me wrong.. Im not complaining about current situation. I just lament the fact we must draw such lines for social convention. How sad is it that we must keep people we Love as friends at a distance for the sake of others which we Love as our Lifemates? Somehow, this does not seem right, yet I can find no solution but to do as such.

Though I will confess.. one of the most comforting feelings in the world is being currled up between the one you love, and one of your best friends (in a compleatly platonic sence of curled up between).

Humans crave touch... yet we deny ourselves contact for fear of hurting those we love, or complicating our lives though missunderstandings.

- Strixus

Re: Hmm

[(Anonymous)]

Btw... something seriously fucked up with that quiz...

3 times taking it - Neutral, Good, Pure Evil

Apparently Beef is more Evil than Fish, and Classical is more Evil than Modern Rock. Oh yes... and Violence is more evil than Philosophy or Sex.

WTF?

Strixus

[(Anonymous)]

find myself being neutral... blerg, i feel evil today, so why the hell do i score neutral?

--JMDC

Re: Hmm

[wolven.livejournal.com]

Exactly. Really upsetting, that is, and no, there is little to be done about it, short of changing social convention, and/or talking with the ones you love, and communicating. I like that, The best.

[wolven.livejournal.com]

It happens. As was said before you, the quiz is a tad off. I had to choose some of my more evil tendencies, to get Neutral. And the rest were just true, of me.

Re: Hmm

[(Anonymous)]

Aye, agreed. Unfortunately, thanks to the joys of socail insecurites that tend to be hammered into the typical western male of our species, that likely isnt going anywhere.
Gah.

[(Anonymous)]

What Poetry Form Are You? (http://quiz.ravenblack.net/poeticform.pl)


I am not Barny!

--Ryam

[(Anonymous)]

fucked up computer, copied the wrong thing... *grumble* sorry...
(http://home.att.net/~slugbutter/evil/)
How evil are you? (http://home.att.net/~slugbutter/evil/)

i think that works...

--JMDC (speaking for Ryam)

[wolven.livejournal.com]

Yeah, i think that Works, too. :)