"Bestrides this dark colossus, the snapping bonfire of mankind’s petty dreams."-Matt Wagner, Grendel

Dreamed of meeting Martin Sheen, and he Quoted this:

'And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
. . .
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.'

And I identified it as "The Colossus," which, in the dream, was correct. Because it also meant this poem: http://plagiarist.com/poetry/1442/

I also dreamed about goin g into the marines, and something about Doom, and it was all very "Serenity," in tone. Quite Odd.

Serenity, by the way, was even more awesome the second time. So Fucking Great. Do yourselves a favour. If you like movies, if you like good writing, if you like believable characters, go see this movie. Now, Damnit!

Off to eat food

Some days.

KMFDM - [Mini Mini Mini]--- Some days, you just want to learn the necessary grace and skill to leap a rooftop, to dance your way through a fight with at least five times your number, to write a sonnet, paint an affective and effective triptych, to walk down the road, always unafraid, knowing that you can take fucking Bus, if it came to that.

Warren Zevon - [Finishing Touches]--- Today is the day we begin. It is the start of something more. And don't tell me that you can't learn grace, cant learn carriage, and how to settle, properly, into your body's natural rhythm and flow. That's bullshit.

I learned, today, thanks to mr_hinzelmann, that there was a book, in the world, called The Self-Aware Universe: How Consciousness Creates the Material World, by Amit Goswami, Ph.D. (Tom Waits - [Flash Pan Hunter]). I was pissed. For about five seconds. Until i realised something: This is a chance to do better. To do more, with my thesis, than simply showing people things that exist, in the backs of their minds, always. This is a chance to prove it. Mathematically, biologically, economically, and logically. They are all human concepts, themselves, so it's only fitting, right?

The Last Dance - [Voices]--- Reading greygirlbeast's post, from earlier today (Here), I realised something else: There is nothing new. There are only more and less effective recombinations of what exists, to evince a set of feelings, in others, which they may not have felt before. There is only the placement, the endless puzzle dance of lengthening and shorthening sides, trying to make the whole perfect, trying to make something shining, and bright, edged, dark, and bloody, and to get it out, where it belongs, and where it will do... whatever the fuck it's supposed to do. I'm not here to tell you anything new, or spiffy. Quite the opposite, really.

I'm here to tell you the things you already know, but refuse to admit to yourselves. But you're obviously leaning that way, anyway, right? Or you wouldn't be here. You don't know you, yet. I don't know myself, completely. There are things we want, things we need, things we do, and we don't know why, we can't figure it out... But you're willing to know. Sometimes.

I'm not your fucking therapist. I'm not here to make you feel better about you, and what you're doing. I'm here to state what I see, purport what I believe, and bring down around us, that which I feel has outlived its usefulness.

Massive Attack - [(Exchange)]--- Do you think that puts us "At odds?" Do you think we're enemies, now, because what you want and what I want may compete, may seem to contradict each other? That I want what you think you have? If you think that you are a fucking moron. The universe is a closed system. There is nothing within it, but everything. Ev. Er. Y. Thing. Use "Multiverse," if you prefer, if that helps you cope. Nothing is at odds. Everything is simply trying to be expressed. And it must. It already Is. It never, ever, will be. Do you get it, yet?

I'm angry, I'm arrogant, and no, I'm not telling you much. But you've heard it all before, right? I've said this? Were you listening?

I'm not the best person, when it comes to making time. I've never quite gotten the knack. I leave people out, I forget plans, I alienate, and I push away. (Björk - [Undo]). I want to be better at that ( and I've said that before, too). I want to become more able to do the things that allow me to pay attention to you. That let me know what's going on with you. That let me hear your truths, your lives. Your stories. Heh. Fucked up song...

I have furniture to move. I said i'd have this room empty, for beard, today.

Ta.

Thesis Research

Pain - [Suckerpunch]--- Books I need to buy:

The Self-Aware Universe by Amit Goswami

Conscious Acts of Creation by William Tiller, Walter Dibble, and Michael Kohane

Mind into Matter: A New Alchemy of Science and Spirit by Fred Alan Wolf

Those, as well as anything found in the bibliography, in the first book. I need to know what I'm up against, here, so I don't fly in blind.

I need to start seriously thinking about those people whom I would like to serve as my thesis advisors. I need people who aren't too horrendously busy (which is pretty much impossible, as everyone I would ask is in the midsts of writing a book), and who I feel i can trust...

Louis Armstrong - [What a Wonderful World]--- This, by the way, is at the root of my worry, about my relationship with my professor. I don't know him, at fucking all, meaning i don't know how far i can trust him. Worries me, when it comes to the type of thing that means my life's work, you know? Of course, the more widely disseminated the information, among people in the department, the more people know what i'm on about, and from whom it came... (Cole Porter, Caroline O'Connor & Chorus - [Anything Goes]). Fuck...

I don't know. I have electronics to move.

Back later.

{9.01: Nellie McKay - [Columbia Is Bleeding]--- Oh, and did I tell you that I got a 90, on my first Hindu Sacred Texts exam? That pissed me off, something fierce.}