Winter Weather.

A Star Called Wormwood - [The Tower]--- Everything is iced over, tonight. I may not be going to work, in the morning, as my neighbourhood is ensconced in Hills.

Saw "House of Flying Daggers," tonight. It was amazing. It was also "Shoot the Piano Player," toward the end. Still amazing.

I'm off.

Something i hate.

Massive Attack - [Exchange]--- The idea that Understanding and Enlightenment has made us less sacred, and less aware of the nature of sacrality. (Warren Zevon - [Excitable Boy]). I think that there are modes and forms, to everything, and that all of these modes are important, in various ways, and are of equal importance, in the scope of the all.

And i don't think that Understanding any of them is a detriment. I hate the thought of it, and i hate the fact that the position, itself, is a necessary component of infinity. Because it means i have to understand them, too. (A Star Called Wormwood - [Synthetic]). Because that's what my way is... Continual understanding. Deja Vu. SOmething about MySpace, and Mperia... Odd...

Anyway. There's something i hate. For me, more and better understanding reveals the secrets of the universe, and gives me real ultimate power(™).

And most of you never answered my question: When you hear the phrase "The Apocalypse," what does that mean, to you? What does it mean to hear people talk about it? (The Dresden Dolls - [Blueprint (Live)]). If it's nothing, then fine, but it's something i'd like to know, if you could spare the time.

Thanks.

{2.15Keep your eyes and ears open today, WOLVEN, because you could come across some interesting information. There could be some changes happening around you, and you could hear details about what is really going on. Pay attention to what others are talking about, because the clues could be right in front of you. Or you might read something that sparks your curiosity. By following the trail like a detective, you could uncover something important.

The Meltdowns - [Battle Hymn]--- Interesting advice, there. Thanks.}

Dreams i had, in the winter weather.

I kept getting woken up, by people trying to make sure i was safe, and alive, indoors. You know, where the ice and snow, and crazy drivers aren't. So, as a result, dreams are a little choppy. But here goes.

More of working with, and showing mech_angel around. Introducing her to people and places. Walking.

somnium Has showed up, in the mall in my head, with a group of people, all of whome are wearing shirts and hats about the Green Lantern Corps. We're in the comic shop, in the mall, and i'm thinking about various comic book families, and the story of Wolverine's life, and they show up. It's time to go to the train.

We're on the train and there are giant fire worms, everywhere. They are metal, and have molten metal, or possibly magma for blood. It shows in their eyes, and in the cracks of their segmented bodies. I've drawn pictures of them, and the MARTA train we're on is government run and operated. We have to destroy the worms, ont eh tracks, because they're trying to destroy them, and we need to get hoome.

Something deeper in the fabric of the train car, understanding about what they are, and i know that they're related to Sandworms.

I see the drawing i've done, and i know that the head is wrong. It's the head of a chinese dragon, and it needs to be the segmented, tri-fold, fore-shortened head of a Sandworm. It's ok, because the picture is still important. We have to crash my and mech_angel's bodies into the worms, on the tracks, in a harrier jet. We're flying in at them, and we leave our bodies, and watch, safely, from the Train car, which is also an undergroud station. Appeased, the worms leave.

Ther is something, here, about an epic battle. The whole thing is Dune, and Mordred's story, in the Arthurian tales, where Mordred is Arthur's son. Only this time it's Paul and Leto II. But they're the same person, and not, and Leto isn't Mordred, when Mordred kills Gurney, inthe Emperor's chamber, during the battle, with a spear flung, non-chalantly, behind him as he walked to find his father, and his doom. The battle rages on. Things fade out.

I woke up, here, because my phoen was ringing again, and i lost some chunks of dream memory. Talked to my mom, about my staying home, and went back to sleep. Everything that follows is hazy recollection.

Playing in a park, wating for people. A tree being there, and people talking to me, as Josh Lymon, from the West Wing. But Josh seems to have gone crazy, or at least Servile. He's serving some strange massive power, and is telling people about it, and why he has to do what it says, even though he doesn't like it. At the same time, as being in a park, he's in a room, in the GSU Village, with some sort of round mesh caged machine, that acts as a super collider, in some sense, and a centrifuge, in another. But it's for people, and clothes. He sleeps curled up on top of it, which, at the same time, puts him inside of it.

mech_angel and I are in the dorms, visting my friend Austin, and it's Dark outside, as in not Night, but Dark. Every trace of light from the outside is gone, but we can still see the city, inthe Dark. Rosie and Devin are here, and other people are around. The Elizabeth that Ben was dating, for a while, is here, and she's being flirty and capricious to cover up the scared. Everyone is playing video games,a nd eating foods we've had delivered, because there isn't much else to do, and mech_angel and i talk, and watch people do things. Rosie and Devin start having sex on Austin's futon, and no one pays any attention.

Back inthe park, everyone is asking me about the tree and the mask, and when the ________ is coming back, to enlighten the world. I tell them i don't know. I have no idea, and it may enver happen. There's an old black man, standing with me next to The Tree, on a hill, and two old Southern Baptist men, at the bottom, under the Tree, next to its roots. One of the old men says something about having been lied to, and that there was no ________, so it could never come back. Then he says "If I'm lying, may I be struck Dead, by The Tree." The old black man next to me fills with Fire, and anger, and places his hand on The Tree. It falls on top of the two men, crushing them, but not yet killing them. The old black man bellows down to them "Don't you Ever, EVER Say that God has lied to you. Or worse than this will happen." This has a feeling like being next to the First Angel of Death, which wasn't really an Angel, at all, but simply Death, in amorphous, nothing-like form. It recedes, and i look behind me, at a spaceship, which is also the meaning behind tha masks, in The Tree. The space ship is also a rock, and has nothing to do with space, at all. I wake up

That..... Yeah....

Hm. Horror Scope was right. Thanks to mr_hinzelmann, for the conversation, and work, this morning.

I'm off to read, watch TV, and... whatever else i feel like, today. No work. Snow day. Well... Technically, it's an Ice Day. ^_^

Later

{Something in the dream about Tori Amos, too...don't remember what, though.}

Things i learn.

The Cure - [Fascination Street]--- Found out, Thursday, that the writer with whom i'm identifying, most, in class, but who also frustrates me on a number of nearly imperceptible levels, was most likely a Nazi sympathizer. (Wümpscüt - [Deliverance]). Makes a lot of his talk of "Pure," societies, unspoiled by modernisation and not "desacrilised" make a lot more sense. The Nationalism, too.

Everything still feels weird and distant, like i've lost a grounding, of what i'm trying to accomplish. Like i don't remember why i started this path. But i Do. I wanted to understand. I wanted to influence and create reality, and i wanted everyone to realise that they were their own gods, on the inside. That perception and reality are the same, and that the world is, literlaly, what you make of it. That the past is what it is, and never is that, but the future is a set path of choices, made freely. That everything was plotted, from the first choice, except what the end is, or how we get there.

Quality. I started this with Quality, and continued it with so much else. (VNV Nation - [Rubicon]). Justice. Thoughts about things.

I really need to update my website.... I really need to do a lot of things.... Fuck, you guys are quiet... Or maybe my hearing's just going, in my old age...

I'm out. "The West Wing" awaits....

{9.49pm: A meme, contracted from xabigailx:

Scan my interest list and pick out the one that seems the oddest to you {Blitzkriegbliss - [Dark]--- Wolven's Addition: Or about which you'd simply like to know more}.

* I'll explain it.

* Then you post this in your journal so other people can ask you about your interests.

{{10.21pm:In Strict Confidence - [Eye of Heaven]--- WOOHOO!!! No work tomorrow! Mall shut down, due to Atlantans freaking out, in the cold! Awesome.}}}

I found what i've been wanting....

The Smiths - [Panic]--- It's validation, like i said, but not that "I'm good enough, smart enough, fuck you, if you don't like me.," No, validation that my external efforts are actually accomplishing something.

Muse - [Time Is Running Out]--- Everything feels like it's slowing down (or it did), and that people weren't seeing... Anything. I've felt more powerful, more capable, and more In the Moment, recently, than i can remember. It's actually been as if i've snapped my fingers, and things have happened, as i've wanted them. Not "vulgar displays of power," as a predecessor would have said, but simple application of will, and understanding of how to balance my actions, in such a way that... I get what i want and need. But No one Else was seeming to Notice. And I don't mean notice like "Hey, Wolven, you're fucking Amazing; here, let me sarafice this fatted calf, to your name and glory." (LUXT - [Perpetusex]). I mean Notice as in Realise.

I want everyone else to do it too, damn it. Not in the same way, or for the same reasons. I don't want everyone else to be like me (except in the fact of their possibly gaining full realisation of Self-hood); I want them to be like Them. Fully and completely Them, to be redundant. This is something that... seems to not be happening. Like everyone is down-trodden, and forelorn, at a time when there should be parties in the streets, and 6 billion parades, in every one's honour. And i don't understand what the problem is.

I want to see you be you. Totally you. I want to watch you do the things only you can do, and do them well. I want to see you, secure in yourself, birthing yourself into existence, literally and metaphorically, because, on a certain level, there isn't a fucking difference.

I want to thank you all for showing me what you are, at whatever point you did, because... It's a driving thing.

Thanks to electroncat, wacko1138, and thenowhere, for conversations, writings, talkings, workings, understandings. (The Art of Noise - [Moments in Love]). Helping me break through.

Also, the meme, here, has been modified.

Later. Off to do things. You should too, gods fuck it. Don't make me come in there.